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Therapy Journeys

Bob’s Recovery of Hope

After 10 years of marriage, Bob felt his couple relationship was no longer working. He was thinking it was time to put an end to this relationship. Bob arrived at the session feeling lost and confused. He didn’t know what direction to take in his life.

As we talked, it turned out Bob had been promoted to a new position in his company the year before. In his previous position, Bob had traveled a lot connecting with a large network of colleagues in the field. But in his new job, Bob found himself on his own behind a desk doing administrative work.

Then shortly after he was promoted, a colleague who lied about work performance, was fired from the company. Bob was devastated by this news. He felt a deep sense of betrayal and loss because of the relationship of trust he had with this person.

In his new job, Bob still had regular contact with a small team of colleagues. But over time, the relationships in this group became tense and Bob found himself confronted with managing anger and discontent.  He sensed a growing fear of meeting with this group.

He woke up in the mornings with tension in his belly and his motivation to work dwindled. He wanted to quit his job. Bob was clearly giving up and wanted out from all his relationships. Gradually it became clear to Bob that just like himself, his couple relationship had been adversely affected by events in his work place over the past year.

As we explored this further, Bob realised how important contact with colleagues in field had been for him as he measured how insecure he had really become.

In seeking ways for Bob to feel more secure, he re-connected to memories of positive connection with friends outside work. And through this remembering, he realised he could restore security in his work relationships by leaving his desk and going out into the field with this group. And he committed to some simple steps to achieve this.

As he envisaged this new possibility for himself in work, his feelings about his couple relationship shifted, and he felt hope again for a more positive future with his partner.

Are you ready to move out of relationship pain?

If so, contact me today at +33.(0) or email me to set up a FREE confidential 10 minute phone consultation with myself.